Perhaps those of you who are over 20 will relate more to this post. Those of us who remember a time before high speed internet was readily available. A time before Tumblr blogs, when Facebook was just getting off the ground. All we really had was TV, radio, and those around us. And every single one of these outlets bombarded us with heterosexuality. Like, it was our only option. Ads for Barbie and Ken came on between shows that only had straight couples.
It would have been hard for any young lesbian to know anything about lesbianism.
Now, I can’t say I have a lesbian squad of my own, but I have spoken with many lesbians across the globe. To no one’s surprise, we all have a similar experience. No matter where we were from, what culture, our interests... We as lesbians had this shared experience of simply existing as lesbians without knowing it was completely possible for two women to be in love.
How could we have known? We didn’t see it on TV. We didn’t hear about it on the radio. We didn’t experience it first hand in our daily lives. No one even said the word lesbian.
I’ve always had a connection and attraction to girls. It felt natural to me, like everyone felt this. I can’t remember exactly when I discovered the concept of homosexuality. Certainly didn’t learn about in school! I do remember being in my late teens when I connected all the dots. I’m a lesbian!
Oh, to remember my first big crush. It was the 2000s. I was still in high school. I don’t know anyone, naturally I was scared. I remember sitting down in class and seeing her. Tall, sporty, brunette. My stomach tied in knots and I knew...
I didn’t have many classes with her, but we did have a mutual friend. It was great way to spend more time with her. The more I got to know her, the harder I fell. She was kind and lovable. I remember day dreaming about her often. But I couldn’t explain what I was feeling. Surely, I just liked her as a friend. Nothing more. Just friends. Because girls couldn’t like girls like that... Could they? Oh honey, I had a big storm coming...
Fast forward a few years, it’s my first year in college. I’ve finally encountered the term lesbian. That was it! That’s what I was! It was such a relief. Thinking back on it now, it seems funny. It reminded me that we, as lesbians, are still on the margins of society. And because of this, we need to stick together.
Did you go through something similar? Tell us your story in the comments!